I remember being on a playground as child, and getting into a fight with my best friend. The next day, I went to school, and she didn’t want to hang out with me any longer and had a new best friend. That feeling was horrible. It was a betrayal. It’s funny to think how naive we are as children, but then that was considered real betrayal. As an adult to experience betrayal from a husband, friend, or other family member can be life changing. How do you rid the pain of betrayal? I wish I had the answer to that, but don’t. I’m just learning how to live with it.
Don’t accept the blame
When others have betrayed you, they’ll blame you for everything. You’re the one that caused them to betray you. Don’t accept this. This may sound like it’s easy not to do, but it’s not. It’s a viscous cycle, and it becomes easy to accept that it’s you. “You caused someone else to betray your trust.” No, this is what weak-minded people do. They place the blame where responsibility is supposed to be taken. Don’t fall for it. You aren’t to blame for what someone else did to you.
It’s a process
You’ll be disappointed, mad, hurt, happy (yes, you can be happy) during this time. It’s the craziest process ever, and you’ll experience every emotion there is, and that’s okay. It’s all apart of the betrayal process. It might take a while for you to accept that you have to go through the complete process in order to get out. That is the annoying part. You have to feel every emotion in order to move forward. Accept it. And move on each day. Because it does get easier even if it feels like it doesn’t. Allow yourself to experience self-pity, but don’t remain there.
I hate this part. lol No seriously, I do. Why do I have to forgive someone who betrayed me? Well, you don’t. You really don’t at all. Yet not forgiving is giving them more power. This sounds so cliche- but forgiveness is for your own healing. The one that betrayed you won’t necessarily care if you forgive them or not, but hanging onto bitterness won’t get you better.
Have you ever experienced betrayal in your life? Let me know in the comments how you overcame it. Let’s help each other heal.